1. Even in the Future, It’s All About Paper Money
Despite all the hi-tech gizmos on display, from the cryosleep pods and exo-skeletal warrior suits to the amazing Avatar-transplant technology, mankind still hasn’t evolved past folding paper money. Jake Sully’s brother — who has an enormous amount of R&D dollars invested in his PhD-achieving ass — dies because he’s robbed for the cash in his wallet. So it’s the decision to not move to an all-electronic funds transfer system by 2154 — hardly credible – that really determines Pandora’s fate.
2. With All that Technology, You’ll Still Need a Wheelchair
Sully is paralyzed from the waist down after a war wound, and thus he gets around in an old-fashioned wheelchair. It’s pretty crummy, really, that science has developed to the point where human consciousness can be transplanted into a genetically engineered 9-foot-tall Na’vi but a spinal column can’t be given an overhaul while-U-wait. Sully explains it costs too much for the lowly likes of himself. Well, that sure sucks, but surely they could come up with a nifty set of mechanical legs for him, given the gnarly exo-suits on display everywhere you look.
3. Cigarettes Will Survive
Earth is now devoid of greenery but tobacco farming apparently still survives — as evidenced by Sigourney Weaver’s Grace Augustine lighting up every chance she gets. Even weirder is that, despite there being hundreds of highly stressed macho warriors stuck on Pandora for six years at a time, she seems to be the only smoker left. Where does she get them? And why does the industry serve one customer?
4. Pandora’s Mining Economy Might Not Stack Up
Doing nasty things the Na’vi to get precious Unobtainium is morally reprehensible, but it also might not really make the best business sense. We’re told the stuff (whose name is to sci-fi what the MacGuffin is to mystery thrillers) goes for — hold on to your piggy banks! — $20M a kilogram. Sounds impressive — until you factor in 145 years of inflation. Right now, platinum goes for about $46,000 a kilo. At 3 percent annual inflation for the next century and a half that becomes $3.5M. But given the state we’re told Earth is in, a 3 percent inflation rate seems pretty optimistic. At 4 percent, you’re looking at $13.5M. If it hits 5 percent then the going rate for platinum would reach $54M per kg. Now factor in the insane cost of traveling to a distant planet, waging a war and transporting Unobtainium back to Earth. Just saying the Corporation might be better off, y’know, growing weed.
5. Aussie-American Accents Are the Way of the 22nd Century
Good call, James Cameron, by letting Sam Worthington keep the Australian twang to his American accent. The actor’s voice maintains a pleasant consistency that wasn’t found in “Terminator Salvation” and recalls the tones of Mel Gibson. Maybe Cameron went a wee bit too far in that direction, though, in the “Braveheart” scene.
To read the rest, get your blue Na’vi ass over to my column at The Wrap.
